"I...reached the conclusion that if I am doing what I am doing because I am an 'attention whore' then I really need to be committed. I have invested everything I have into trying to bring peace with justice to a country that wants neither. If an individual wants both, then normally he/she is not (sic) willing to do more than walk in a protest march or sit behind his/her computer criticizing others. I have spent every available cent I got from the money a 'grateful' country gave me when they killed my son and every penny that I have received in speaking or book fees since then. I have sacrificed a 29 year marriage and have traveled for extended periods of time away from Casey?s brother and sisters and my health has suffered and my hospital bills from last summer (when I almost died) are in collection because I have used all my energy trying to stop this country from slaughtering innocent human beings. I have been called every despicable name that small minds can think of and have had my life threatened many times."
What struck me most about this quote is what Sheehan "sacrificed" for her aspirations of bringing peace with justice. Especially the part about sacrificing a 29 year marriage and neglecting her living sons and daughters. I don't mean to pick on this woman, but I do want to point something out, something I'm sure she completely understands.
It is easy to commit yourself to a cause for your fellow man as opposed to actually committing yourself to your fellow man. Actually loving other people, like your husband and your children, is tough work, in fact it's one of the most difficult tasks anyone can do. It involves completely dying to yourself over and over. I believe Sheehan chose an easier, and ultimately less fulfilling path, and that is to love an ideal, a utopian vision, or maybe just media attention (but that's not for me to judge) more so than the very people she had made a covenant to, her family.
If I could speak in any language in heaven or on earth but didn't love others, I would only be making meaningless noise like a loud gong or a claning cymbal...If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn't love others, I would be of no value whatsoever. 1 Corinthians 1:1&3
When I get passionate about ideals, about prophetic visions of a better life, I get critical, and when I get critical, I tend to aim my criticism at everything and everyone except myself. I become terribly self-righteous and blind to my own responsibilities as a son, a brother, a friend, and most importantly a child of God.
Based upon what she has stated here, I would venture to assume Sheehan had neglected living her ideals by simply living to make her ideals known (a fine line that means the difference between success and failure).
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