Can parental rights be terminated due to lack of visitation and if so how long does a parent have to be out of a child's life before this can be done? In my skids case BM won't see the kids until next summer which will make 2 years before she sees them.
SD8 is really getting on my nerves tonight. DH grounded her from the computer tonight b/c she didn't do her homework last night for what turned out to be a pretty important project. Homework is one of the few issues DH seems to actually care about where SD is concerned - most of the time he can't see anything but her golden glow of perfection. After we had dinner, she started pestering DH to let her play computer. He was already playing his own game on the computer, and told her no, reminding her that she was grounded, but he gave her dessert instead. After her treat, SD proceeded to get a book and sit next to DH vocalizing loudly (screeching, whooping, making weird noises). This just drives me nuts, but DH can completely tune it out.
SD casually says to me at dinner, "So my friend tells me you told her mom to check out the sexual offender site online." I say, "She did?" and drop it. Now I'm getting a little irritated at my neighbor. I looked on our local county sheriff's site and it said that though I couldn't post fliers about SD's friend's SF having been convicted of Sexual Battery of a minor (14 yr old student/ he was a teacher/coach of girls basketball at the time)I could tell my neighbors to check out the website, which I did of one mom of another friend of SD's a few days ago. I told my neighbor that I didn't want her to mention to ANYONE who told her to check the sight (still have a fear of being sued over this.) My neighbor said, "No problem." Then I told her to call me after she looked at it so we could pow wow over how to get through to our daughters not to hang out at their friend's house, while still protecting the man's identity (purely for self preservation, I surely don't want a 6'2" 39 yr old rapist angrily showing up on my doorstep.) Well...evidently my neighbor told her daughter that I told her about the list, oh I'm sure she told her 13 year old not to share that with my SD. Why don't some parents get that their children are children and are not capable of keeping confidence.
I have been stewing on this one for mths. My FH used to live in the mid-west (we- thank god live 3 states away) and that is where his ex and SD live. They were never married and broke up before SD was born. The family did not care for her when they were together but was unhappy with my FH for not marrying her because they had a child together (what a bunch of nutcases) He didn't give a crap what his family said because he was trying to get the woman out of his house for a year and was dating someone else and he went out partying one night thinking it was his g/f (who drove him home) and it was his ex in his bed the next am - and he was so drunk he thought he had sex with his current g/f!!!!! CRAZY! (WHOLE OTHER FORUM). When ex finds out she is pregnant and asks if he is going to marry her now he was like no I don't love you and I will NEVER marry you - crazy ex finally moves out! After saying she had no money no where to go, no friends, oh the apt I was trying to get fell through, my car broke down, whatever. SO ex was MIA from their lives for about 8 yrs. Well one day she decides to go to their church (they are strict catholics)so now the family treats her like their DAUGHTER IN LAW. MY FH used to get contracts for work and move for a year here 6mths here and when he was gone the ex would always bring SD and hang out like she was part of the family. When FH was in town he would bring his daughter but she would always try to include herself.
For anyone that remembers, my BS12's biodad has decided to resurface after 12 years of being gone. So I went to court a couple of weeks ago and was awarded temporary sole custody with an uncontested final orders hearing set for next month. He hasn't shown up to any of the hearings so far so all was well in the world with this whole ordeal to be over in a month.
SS called to talk to BF yesterday. Apparently he has a sore throat and doesn't want to come on visitation this weekend (so we're starting this again it seems). Well, BM offered to let BF have him next weekend to make up for it, meaning that we'd have him two weekends in a row. We can't do that, though, because we already have plans to be out of town next weekend. BF suggested that maybe he could have SS three weeks from now, meaning he'd have SS three weekends in a row. This wasn't acceptable to BM. Why not? I must ask. She gets SS three weekends in a row since he's not coming this weekend. Oh yeah, plus the fact that school's out and she doesn't work, so he's with her every day of the week too...Why is it not acceptable that BF see SS three weekends in a row?
I am a soon to be SM to 2 tweens. My fiance is a wonderful man who has always tried to hold his kids best interests ahead of his own and as a result spent a long time in a nightmare marriage. His kids and I seem to get along well most of the time and I care for them very much but in the past year I find myself questioning their sincerity and wondering if they are only "going thru the motions" when they are with us.
The CSP lady was mainly asking us questions about BM since she was the one who had the report called on her. She wasn't inspecting us but instead saw the fact that we are the better house hold for SD. She even went as far as to give us advice. The reason she liked us so much is because she was easily able to see passed BM's bull. It is a funny story too because BM totally put on an act of caring so much and that the situation BF described was wrong, but of course her own stupidity got the best of her. She contradicted her own story. We are lucky to have a BM that is so stupid she can't hid it lol.
because if it were, i would let the profanity fly. i am heading into a weekend that will require every ounce of self-control possible. i'm getting a double whammy. visiting the skid at his grandparents house.
That BF and I had agreed to last July when BM and skids conspired to make a phoney child abuse charge against us. This is very symbolic b/c I received about 2 nano seconds of support from BF with the new house rules. I honestly thought we were making progress, until skids had a major fit b/c we made them eat meatloaf and "wouldn't come" any more. IN fact youngest SS 5 (now 5 1/2) specifically said that he would come over ONLY IF WE DIDN'T SERVE MEATLOAF anymore!!!
So I had ss yesterday on Bm's day. I was supposed to pick him up this morning at 9am for Dh's day. Ha!!
I get two min. away from Bm's house and my cell phone rings. It's Dh. He told me that Bm just called him and said that ss isn't ready and won't be for awhile. Bm waited until 8:55am to call and tell Dh that ss had diarrhea when he woke up this morning. Um, ok, then why didn't she call right then?!
so this will be the first time we have seen SD in over a month bc of all of BMs bs at court. needless to say i will be disengaging to the max. i just cant do it...all the drama from court and all that happened and how the situation is now is just too fresh and i really cant deal. i will be home as little as possible this wkend. i just cant be around SD rite now. i know its not her fault, i know that, but looking at her is just too painful after everything we've been thru at court, and everything we've been thru w BM. plus, not being around us for over a month, im sure her manners, or lack thereof, have gotten even worse. i just think its best to remove myself from the situation as much as possible, as least for this wkend, until i can resolve it all alittle better in my mind.
Ok so we are hearing all the I want to live here blah blah...But nothing has come of it, so I say to DH, as we are about to do mediation, we may need to discuss this with mediators (where he wants to live, she aint gonna give up without a fight) so please talk to SS about living here, yay or nay, so we can start getting a room ready, school enrollment whatever.
My SF is getting better about things. Yesterday he was not home to supervise construction going on in my folks' backyard. My mom was on & off the phone with him all day, & she knew he was ticked off because it didn't get done to his specifications. I was there when he came home & everyone expected him to be mad & take it out on everyone. That's what he used to do. If he couldn't deal with the source of the problem, he would nag & pick at everyone in the house relentlessly. But yesterday he didn't. He went outside with my mother & had an adult conversation. He was mad beause he's paying for this & it's not being done the way he wants it. That's understandable. What was so cool is that he didn't direct his anger at anyone in the house, so he's going to talk to the contractor about it.
ok so I havent vented very much lately mostly cuz FH had my original screen name and knew I posted. although I try to talk to him about things he is just so damn stubborn. So I come here to release and get good advice or just understanding.